OLD SET OF MEMORIES

They say that there would be always that time that you would like to change the way we did things
And I felt like that with you

As I begin to think about things
I just wish I could turn back time
And did things differently

I sit in a room
And begin to wonder where did it all you wrong
Maybe I would find a reason to be strong

But I couldn’t…..
Instead I found myself thinking about all the silly conversations that we had

How it was easy to talk about you about anything and everything
Where I’d be able to tickle your funny bone
And your day would be made

You made everyday exciting for me
Because I knew that I could talk to you
And you would understand how I’m feeling

I miss our silly facebook conversations
Because I always look forward to the silly facebook stickers

You made me feel like I could be me
And you wouldn’t judge me

You made flaws seem so beautiful
That it was easy for me to come and talk to you

At that point I felt like a rock
Being strong that I couldn’t be sock puppet

I was able to speak my mind
And you didn’t judge me

Truthfully speaking
I miss the old us…
Where did we go wrong at this point in time??

Everything felt perfect
I thought maybe if I broke down my walls
You would open up to me

But instead each time I try….
I feel like I’m annoying you
Turning into a beast I don’t want you to see

Each time I try
Feels like you shooting me
Telling me to stay away from you

But honestly speaking….
I come in peace
That I’ve surrendered

I’m just trying to get to know the real you
Hoping that you would grant me enough time

As much as I want to fix the time clock
I just want to know that you’ll be there waiting for me
Like you said everyday of every month of every year

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UNEXPLAINABLE EMOTIONS

Your eyes
Are the windows of your handsome soul
That I get lost in them whenever I stare at you

Your smile
That’s my sunshine and the light of my life
Gives me strength to face each day like it’s my last

Your heart
My favorite pillow at night
That whenever I lay on your chest,I immediately fall asleep
And have sweet dreams of you

Your arms
Are my shield of protection
That I can face each challenge that life throws at me with you by side

As I think how lucky I am to have you
My rock and pillar of strength
That I thank God for blessing me with a wonderful soul like you

The fights
The arguments
The silent treatments etc…

Get the better of me
As I fear that it may tear us apart
But I realized that I rather experience all of this with you

I might have my own perception on how a lady should be treated
But I didn’t think about the reality of life

As you always wondered why do I feel this way about you

I wish I could find the words to describe I feel about you
As I realized that these feelings are deeper than I thought they would actually be

That it reminds me of the first time I met you
I was afraid to touch you
To hold you close to my heart

As you stared into my eyes
I was afraid to fall for you
My walls got stronger than before

They say it’s very rare for you to find someone you might have a connection with

Well,I was really lucky an immediate connection with you
That as much as I wanted to sleep
You made my exhaustion and tiredness disappear

Being with you that night
Made my smile so bright
That I wanted to get to know you better

As I stare into your eyes
I wish that you could see the effort that I’m making
Trying my best to break down your walls
And get to the core of your heart without hurting you…….

But all I can ever do…..
Is hope and pray that you would grant me the opportunity to tell you in person
How much I……I love you
And mean it with every word and every tear

AN ABUSIVE LOVE

A broken soul
With a million scars on her body
She stares at the messed up image

As her eyes turn red
From all the crying

As he made her feel like nothing
She suffered from low self-esteem
Losing little pieces of herself

She becomes an addict
Addicted his love
It’s hard for her to see the light

Blinded by his love
She couldn’t see how much his hurting her

Open wounds
Million scars on her face
He doesn’t notice the damage on her face

All he sees is a punching bag
One punch in the face
Two in the chest

She laid there with no one to help her
As he kicked her like a dog

He barely noticed the internal consequences

She tries to fight for herself
But his anger makes him stronger by the second

He pushes her against the wall
And starts beating up hard

Two punches in the face
One in the stomach

As he spits in her face like a dog
He walks away with smile in his face

And she is left there in the dark
Crying her eyes out
She curls up with a blanket

She eventually falls asleep
She wakes up in his arms
Hoping that day would be better

FEELINGS

Spiralling out of control
That’s the life that she was living
As she found herself diving into the ocean of the unknown

Her heart is torn into pieces
As she finally sees the truth

The girl that is blinded by love

Doesn’t seem to believe in love anymore
As she found herself hurting

Every fight
Argument
Led to the moment when he broke her heart

As she thought of him as a guy that she would pass time with

But her likes for him
Turned into love
And an instant she fell completely in love with him

That losing him feels like a knife through her chest
Like an unexpected storm that she didn’t see coming

As she pushes him away
She never realized that she would push him into the arms of comfort
The arms of adultery
The arms of a one night stand

SACRIFICED SOUL

They say each of us have calling
And yours happened to be protecting the country

My heart has a million scars
As each goodbye becomes harder for me
Tears roll down my face

As I watched you wave goodbye
But fear gets the better of me
As I think that goodbye could be the last time I see you

Each knock on the door becomes like a scary movie

I begin to dread the day that you wouldn’t come home
That I wouldn’t run into arms and give you a big hug

I wish that you were here with me
Protecting me from the world
Being my rock when I’m feeling down

As I see everyone else happy with their partners
I begin to miss you even more

Minutes turn into hours
Hours turn into days
Days turn into weeks
Weeks turn into months
And I begin to wish that you were home

As the phone starts ringing
My heart starts beating up hard
And I begin to pray that it’s you calling with good news

As I hear a knock on the door
I hope that it’s you

But it’s your colleague
Carrying the flag and your chain
As I see the pain in their eyes

And I knew that you were gone
A soul that put his country’s need before he’s own

My hero
Gone to be my guardian angel in heaven

EMERGENCY:I NEED TO FIND ME

A broken soul
Left with an open wound
As all the negative words that were cursed upon my life came to pass

Words that I couldn’t even change into positive no matter how times I tried
I just realized that it was never good enough for you

As your words come like sharp knife through my chest
Attacking me from both sides
I am left with million scars that won’t go away

I found myself laying on the table
And surgical doctors try to stop the bleeding trauma
But it becomes to much

As they put pressure on all my open wounds
But one by one
These wounds continue to bleed

The doctors question what’s is causing the blood vessels to bleed so much?

So they cut me open harmonic scalple
To check from which direction the bleeding is coming from

They used suction tube to remove all the blood
As they see a leak in one of the vessels

They begin to patch it up

My heartbeat begins to drop
As they realized that wounds are getting deeper

The doctor tells the nurse to bring the defilbrillation
To restore the heart beat

But she came it was to late
My heart stopped
And my mind may peace with the fact that I was never good enough

THE UNCENSORED VERSIONS OF HER

Ugly
Stupid
Are the words that come into her head

Alone
In a room filled with darkness
It seems hard to believe what the world says

Bottled up emotions
Something that she is so use to doing it
That it became an addiction

Communication is the only way
But she can’t even do that anymore without hurting his feelings

As her heart is filled with loads of love
She wonders if it will be good enough for him

So she escape from the wall that she built around her
But she wonder if he still want to get to know the real her

Jealousy
Becomes one the beast that she doesn’t want to himsee
So she locks that side of herself away

All he ever sees the scars on her body
But not on her face
As she hide herself behind the mask

A mask that has become a part of her
That it’s hard to let go of it
Will he ever remove that mask to see the real her ??

The Vulnerable
Scared
Fearful
Broken
Depressed
Insecure
Emotional
Bottled up
Me??

Would he be able to love her??
The girl who cries a lot
Happy or Sad
It still remains the same

The girl who has never been asked out in person
Introvert at first
But once he gets to know her then she’s an extrovert

The girl who gets loves watching romcom
And believes in fairytales

The girl who loves her tomboy swagg
But she’s a classy lady at heart

The girl who loves listening to Trey Songz
But doesn’t mind listening to deep house because it’s happens to her favorite

The girl who doesn’t mind holding your hand and doesn’t get bored while getting to you

The girl would rather be in your arms at this moment in time instead of away from you for so long

The girl who constantly overthink everything and she make sure that everyone is okay before she worries about herself

The girl who cherishes every little moment
That you would spend with her

Come rain or shine
She’ll always be there for you
Just to keep 100

That girl who loves
And believe in every little love quote

Yes,that girl
Cherish her
Because girls like that don’t come everyday